search for help in your local community:

Abuse/NeglectAIDS-Related ServicesAlcohol AbuseDomestic ViolenceDrug AbuseEmergenciesEmployment/EducationEmrg. Shelter YouthGay/Lesbian YouthHomeless/RunawayHotlines/ReferralsHousing/TransitionalLaw EnforcementLegal AssistanceMedical HealthMental HealthPregnancy/ParentingRefugee/TraffickingReligious/PastoralSelf-Help ServicesShelter/EmergencyShelter/Emergency Youth

in

state AK, ALASKAAL, ALABAMAAR, ARKANSASAS, AMERICAN SAMOAAZ, ARIZONACA, CALIFORNIACO, COLORADOCT, CONNECTICUTDC, DISTRICT OF COLUMBIADE, DELAWAREFL, FLORIDAFM, FEDERATED STATES OF MICRONESIAGA, GEORGIAGU, GUAMHI, HAWAIIIA, IOWAID, IDAHOIL, ILLINOISIN, INDIANAKS, KANSASKY, KENTUCKYLA, LOUISIANAMA, MASSACHUSETTSMD, MARYLANDME, MAINEMH, MARSHALL ISLANDSMI, MICHIGANMN, MINNESOTAMO, MISSOURIMP, NORTHERN MARIANA ISLANDSMS, MISSISSIPPIMT, MONTANANC, NORTH CAROLINAND, NORTH DAKOTANE, NEBRASKANH, NEW HAMPSHIRENJ, NEW JERSEYNM, NEW MEXICONV, NEVADANY, NEW YORKOH, OHIOOK, OKLAHOMAOR, OREGONPA, PENNSYLVANIAPR, PUERTO RICOPW, PALAURI, RHODE ISLANDSC, SOUTH CAROLINASD, SOUTH DAKOTATN, TENNESSEETX, TEXASUT, UTAHVA, VIRGINIAVI, VIRGIN ISLANDSVT, VERMONTWA, WASHINGTONWI, WISCONSINWV, WEST VIRGINIAWY, WYOMING

» Help!

© 2008 Covenant House • PRIVACY STATEMENT • SITE MAP • JOBS • OUR LOCATIONS

What feelings are young people facing today?

There are many kinds of feelings facing the youth today. If the child or teen you care about is suffering from poor self-esteem, stress, anxiety, loneliness, grief, or anger that might lead to depression or thoughts of suicide, this is the place to talk to someone who can help.

Share your questions about feelings with in the Nineline Forum.

Poor self-esteem is the feeling of worthlessness, feeling unloved, and unaccomplished. These feelings may cause the child or teen you are concern about to be shy, withdrawn and lacking in confidence. It may affect their friendships, school achievement, after-school activities, and/or family life. They may feel this way because you or their parents have overly high expectations for them - either socially or at school. Or, they may feel this way because they are living in a family that is experiencing certain problems, e.g., alcohol, drugs, mental illness, domestic violence, etc. Help them seek out counseling. Tell them to talk to friends and relatives, who are able to listen to their feelings. Assist them in seeking out activities they're good at to boost their self-esteem. Cultivate a hopeful, optimistic view of their life with them – help them believe they are a good person.

Stress can act like an alarm in an emergency - motivating one to act quickly to resolve the problem. But more often, stress is triggered by feelings like anxiety, worry and fear – it can be demobilizing, making it impossible for one to make progress towards resolving problems. It is important to recognize what is causing the stress to build up (such as pressure to achieve, fear of failure or success, etc.) before it overwhelms or leads to depression.

Anxiety is a common feeling caused by fearing or worrying about things in every day life. Sometimes, anxieties are passed down from parent to child- an anxious and fearful parent, for example, can create fear and anxiety in a child. These thoughts might lead to physical symptoms like a pounding heart, heavy breathing or perspiration - even dizziness or a stomachache. As difficult as it may be, admitting one’s anxieties and talking about them (such as "I'm anxious about telling my Mom her drinking bothers me") will most likely aid in the process to overcome them.

Loneliness is a painful feeling for teenagers. It is often caused by the rejection of friends or the searching for approval and acceptance. One might also experience loneliness in the maturing process or the separation from parents even though they enjoy their newfound independence. It's important to remember that loneliness is usually a temporary feeling as well as an opportunity to get to know oneself and set goals for one’s future. Some people enjoy being alone; others do not. The teen or child you are concerned about probably already know which category they fall into – aid them in the discovery of why.

Grief is a totally natural response to being separated from someone or something one feels attached to. One may feel grief over the death of a family friend, the breakup with a boyfriend or girlfriend, the loss of an important activity (like a spot on the soccer team) or anything else important to him or her. Remember that grief is a stage people go through to cope with a loss (just like crying when you break a bone) but if you find the child you are concerned about is in a constant state of grief you should reach out to them and offer your support. Help them to find counseling or further forms of therapy.

Anger can be a normal, natural even healthy feeling or - in the case of someone quick-tempered - a chronic problem. Constant feelings of anger can leave one feeling impulsive, isolated and unsatisfied. It is better to recognize and talk about feelings of anger than to keep them bottled up until one explodes. Youth who do not know how to control their anger or do not understand where their anger is coming from – can have a tendency to lash out violently at their peers, friends, and or family. They also may be self-destructive and destroy personal or other people’s property.

Depression is a continually hopeless state of mind, and can be brought on by any of the feelings above. Depression itself can lead you to feelings of suicide. It is important for the child you are concerned about to take some time to figure out just what they are feeling and why they are feeling that way before it gets worse. Seek professional counseling if necessary. Call Nineline if you need a referral to a counseling program or mental health clinic.

Thoughts of suicide can sometimes be triggered by the feelings above. This is especially true if a youth/child you are worried about is constantly feeling depressed. It is important to discuss with them options to solving problems in their lives, and to give someone you are concerned about a lot of support in doing so. If you are worried about someone, whom you feel is suicidal, call 911 or Nineline, or assist the child you are concerned about to call. Help is just a phone call away.