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Is abstinence an option for me?

These days, some kids postpone having sex until they reach a certain age or commit to a relationship. Some of them are motivated by religious reasons, others by concern about getting pregnant, contracting HIV/AIDS or other sexually transmitted diseases (STDs). Others are motivated by the desire to accomplish goals like finishing high school or college, getting a good job or finding a life partner before they begin a sexual relationship.

Abstinence - not having sex (vaginal, anal and oral sex) - is the only 100% sure way not to get pregnant or catch an STD. Abstinence doesn’t mean you can’t be close, affectionate or intimate with one another. It’s never too late – even if you’ve had sex before - you can decide to abstain from sex in the future.

Talk with your partner, if you aren’t close enough to talk about sex, maybe you aren’t close enough to have sex. With your partner’s support, you can build a stronger relationship while you wait to begin your sexual relationship. Find creative non-sexual ways to show your feelings for each other.

Here are some partners’ negative feelings about abstinence and ideas for how to respond. Don’t have sex with someone just because it’s easier to do than talk!"

"If you loved me, you’d do it with me."
"If you loved me, you’d respect my decision."

"Everybody is doing it."
""I’m somebody, and I’m not doing it."

"What’s your problem? "
""I think we should wait. There’s nothing wrong with that."

"But I love you!"
"If you love me, you’ll help me wait."

"If you won’t do it, I’ll find somebody who will."
"I’m sorry I don’t mean more to you than that."